Thursday, October 16, 2008

My Girl Wants To Party All The Time...

Sports Illustrated's Signs of the Apocalypse is always worth six seconds of my time. It's rarely hilarious (or mind-blowing, or whatever SI is going for), but it's worth it.

Which brings me to Howard Stern's revealing interview with Maureen McCormick this morning. And by "revealing," I mean McCormick, the gal who played Marcia Brady, admitted to being a coke whore back in the mid-to-late 70's. Not someone who occasionally messed around with cocaine or someone who gradually developed a habit...but a coke whore. Jan's big sister, the most wholesome girl in the world, claimed to have sex at least four times in exchange for yeyo.

If I could trade places with anyone, at any time (aside from Nick Van Exel in the first half of the '93 Elite Eight game against North Carolina), I would be the guy who first played bang-bang with Maureen McCormick because she needed another line of cocaine. That might seem despicable, and I don't necessarily disagree, but very few people have a claim to fame as impressive as, "I gave Marcia Brady drugs in exchange for unprotected intercourse."

Am I crazy or is that the best possible icebreaker one could have at a cocktail party?

-Brad Spieser (